Hello guys how are you doing there...

I recently started a program of self help guided by a guy whose name is David Deangelo, well his real name is Eben Pagan , he is the most famous man in the industry of women and dating...I have read his books and I have seen his DVDs...

Basically a woman is attracted to guys that are fun (with a little bit of arragance), guys that are secure, masculine, strong, that have a good body language, and mostly men that are independent etc , etc (NOT WUSSIES)... through the program I see that David Deangelo teaches a lot of psychology, a lot of NLP techniques, he mentions guys like Dr. Wayne Dyer, Tonny Robbins and so on....

Well I would like if someone would calibrate Mr. Eben Pagan and his programs please...

His web site is

http://www.doubleyourdating.com/ and his biography

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_DeAngelo


Thanks.!

I know I know that women and dating has little to do with spirituality and David Hawkins books... but I would like to know if the path of this guy is integrous.


Yours...

Hmm. Pausing from self-imposed hiatus...

Maybe a couple of questions to ask are:

Where does arrogance calibrate? Does he advocate an air of arrogance or does he differentiate between arrogance (pridefullness) and self-confidence?

Physical attraction ("masculine, strong, etc") is also a remnant of the evolutionary mating instinct whereby a mate is drawn toward a stronger, more healthy mate to produce healthier offspring. That's not to say that, over 200, physical attraction doesn't occur! We all recognize the beauty of a healthy body. However, examine the emphasis and tone placed on it.

When Charity and I were first together, I remember us browsing through a bookstore and coming across a book about dating that included "The Rules" in the title. Essentially, the book was about playing games to manipulate attention in order to "get" someone hooked into you. The theme truly was manipulation, not being genuine.

Interestingly, it also explained the "nice guys finish last" syndrome since the more genuine peopled I've known who suffered from the "nice guys" syndrome tend not to play that sort of game. It had always fascinated me how many women I'd known chose the guys who turned out to be less than genuine while keeping the genuine guys as "a really good friend." Perhaps there was an instinct that the friend would be there for them to lend support during their dating ups and downs. At the same time, the missing factor in their equation is that any deep relationship must include and yet build on a solid friendship.

Does he place an emphasis on genuineness? Or does he advocate an approach that manipulates in order to get?

Maybe something above will help you to feel out where he's coming from. And, yes, some aspects of these sorts of things can be examined from a spiritual perspective since anything can be a study of how things or people interact at different levels.

Just food for thought.


Tim

Wow... I tried to respond to this, but am finding it very difficult to answer concisely.

Not all women want the same thing. Not all men want the same thing. But a personal story here... when I met Tim, I was married to a man who didn't treat me very well. The counselor told us to go home and figure out exactly what we wanted from each other and tell each other. I was stumped for a while until I realized that I wanted to be treated like he treated his friends. He treated them well. Loyalty, respect, love, etc. Well, he did not know how to be my husband and my friend simultaneously. I didn't see how he could be my husband without being my friend.

We are obviously divorced. Talk about unequally yolked.

With Tim, the friendship came first. It comes first. It always does. The first line of our wedding vows is "I promise to be your best friend, first and foremost..."

Not all women want their husband to be their best friend... not all men want their wife to be their best friend... but when both see it and want it... well... I thank God every day for Tim being in my life. Even through the bumps. It's an amazing thing we have. Words are inadequate.

But it's not a matter of figuring out what a woman wants... it's a matter of figuring out what you want and finding the woman that wants the same thing. Otherwise... you are just faking it until you get your hooks into her (or if you are a woman... into him) and that is all manipulation and nonintegrous.

I calibrate his material non-integrous. Himself I calibrate in 300s. Neil Strauss calibrates in the 400s, FYI, but Mystery Method non-integrous as well. There may be some PUA material out there that is integrous - Juggler's ebook seems to calibrate in 200s. Direct game in general is based on honesty at least, so you may wish to stick to that.

As sexuality calibrates neutral, it will be strongly influenced by intention, I'd presume.

I got about 175 (Pride) for Deangelo's work.

His philosophy appears to be almost stereotypical. The concept of "What Women Want" is a strained one, especially when it is written primarily by men who are interested in helping other men acquire one (or many) for dating. What women want, as Charity put it in another context, is what women want. It's individual, and although there are plenty of women who, due to evolutionary instincts, want the same stereotypical things, there are gazillions of variations on a theme. Additionally, it varies tremendously from one age group to another and indeed from one LoC to another.

It should be said that the so called "wimpy" characteristics in men - kindness, honesty, generosity, non-judgment, consideration, etc. - are often associated with the field of Love (the 500s). When one progresses into that LoC, the archetypes of masculinity and femininity become less and less important. One starts to see people as simply other people to be loved - not male or women, black or white, straight or gay, old or young, beautiful or ugly.

If you are walking a spiritual path, advice about dating that calibrates below 200 is effectively less than worthless. It can actually be damaging.

My advice would be to meditate on what you want in a relationship and use non-linear or manifestation techniques to attain that goal. Imagine yourself with a woman that you truly love, imagine loving her and her loving you. Stay focused on the outcome not the steps in between. Then, just go out and have fun, make yourself available, give God as many pathways as possible to bring what you want to you. If you follow these steps, it will happen.

Michael

Good...

they calibrate at the level of pride, yes I guessed that in the beginning.

Try this fellow instead:

http://www.youtube.com/user/bsmith3257

Before focus shifted to spirituality there was an obsession with materials such as David D's. All affordable material was acquired and consumed, but to no avail. This is because I was functioning from a lower level of consciosness. Pride contextualized sexual rejection from a female as a rejection of "me." This was of course a fallacy provided by the ego. Furthermore, willingness was not present so material was absorbed without being put to use. It seems as though the focus should be on what is described as "inner game," which is in reality advancing ones LoC. The focus of inner game as it is taught by most gurus involves a detachment from outcome. Complete detachment is portrayed as a pinnacle of inner game achievement. However, this exhibits the characteristics of neutrality, which calibrates only at 250. By framing lower levels as the standard or goal, one becomes stuck and it is difficult to transcend those levels. Furthermore, certain "outer game" techniques such as push/pull, teasing, ect. can be misinterpreted to cause one to have a lower opinion of females. This can also occur as one becomes proficient; the ease with which females can be manipulated causes one to view them in a more negative light. All of these traps are barriers to unconditional love. This brings into awareness Dr. Hawkins description of a spiritual retreat in which no words were said yet everyone understood what everyone was thinking. It is not the words that are important, but the attitude they convey. If one teases women from a position of authority to gratify their ego then Deangelo's methods can be used negatively. However, if teasing is used to enhance the experience and create a pleasant, fun environment which can be enjoyed by all, then it is used in a context which better facilitates spiritual progress. Thus, the material should be filtered and used only with correct intentions.

-live your life like a prayer

Spot on, Delta.

Fortunately, that 'community' and its 'material' spurred numerous people including myself to find the spiritual path.

It had the same positive effect on me. I became convinced that changing external conditions would result in inner peace and fulfillment. My personal breaking point came when I understood that not even sexual fulfillment would satiate my inner 'void'. However, sexual fulfillment, if desired, is only an added bonus of a spiritual seeker; humans are naturally attracted to the confidence, peaceful, and secure aura which accompanies those who pursue enlightenment.